Primitive London (1967)

I dislike mondo films, mostly because I want to be enjoyed by movies, not disgusted by them. But there is of course mondo-esque films I can watch: the cute ones. The cuddly. The innocent. The charming and silly. Mondos that are far away from circumcisions and “real” executions. Sweden: Heaven and Hell is one mondo I can handle, mostly because it’s so absurd when you actually is Swedish and live in Sweden. Another one is Primitive London, released on a stunning BD from BFI. It’s also more entertaining then London in the Raw, which mostly featured people eating at “exotic” restaurants and a few tits here and there.

Primitive London also sets out to show the real London, the reality behind the headlines and rumors and manages to show everything except the real reality. And that’s what I want. This time we’re getting a closer look at hat making, beatniks and mods (a couple of amazing interviews here), a striptease school, a goldfish-surgery (and feeding whisky to the goldfish afterwards), more nude dancing, a stand-up comedian, female judo, a guy showing his muscles, pop artists, more nudity and even more nudity. Everything connected with a dry voice-over pretending to do something serious.

Not that the movie itself is serious. Most of the footage is made up, not real stuff, and at least twice the voices of the producer and director breaks into the soundtrack and starts bickering about how much nudity the movie shows. The director wants to make something more serious, while the producer wants more girls and tits! A bit stiff written, but still kinda funny. What I enjoy with a movie like this is the sensationalism that is constructed around subjects that aren’t that sensational. It gives an innocent aura around totally absurd subjects, which is my kinda aura.

What feels unnecessary is the graphic birth scene, complete with everything you don’t wanna see in HD! I never felt why this should be included in every shockumentary about there, because what I know it’s around 267 births per minute all around the world, so why even include such a common thing in a shockumentary about strippers in London is beyond what I can understand. Another scene which can be a little bit disturbing is a visit to the chicken-factory where we get to see in close-up how a chicken is slaughtered. Not fun.

But 99,8 % of of the movie is filled with fun and joy and morality tales about the youth of today, which are evil, selfish and not able to take care of themselves. As usual then, always blame it on the kids!